


MCR Helena X Reader

by Pleading_Eyes



Category: My Chemical Romance
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Angst, Car Accidents, Character Death, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Explicit Language, F/F, F/M, Female Homosexuality, Gender-Neutral Pronouns, Loss, Romance, Suffering, im so sorry, three cheers for sweet revenge
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-25
Updated: 2016-02-25
Packaged: 2018-05-23 03:26:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 984
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6103261
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pleading_Eyes/pseuds/Pleading_Eyes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>You cope with the loss of your lover...</p>
            </blockquote>





	MCR Helena X Reader

_Long ago. Just like the hearse, you die to get in again_

_We are so far from you_

 

 

You wiped your eyes, dark black eyeliner streaking down your face as you fought back tears. You can't believe she's really dead. Helena. The crowd shambled into the church like half-rotted emo zombies. This is all your fault. This is all your goddamn fault. You should have made her stay that night. Just one night and none of this would have happened. She wasn't okay to drive.

 

_Burning on just like a match you strike to incinerate_

_The lives of everyone you know_

_And what's the worst you take (worst you take)_

_From every heart you break (heart you break)_

_And like the blade you stain (blade you stain)_

_Well, I've been holding on tonight_

 

You took a deep breath and sat in the first pew next to her brother. He gave you a curt nod. He didn't blame you. No one did. Only yourself. Oh how she haunted you. Even in death you just want to be in her arms. You were thankful Gerard didn't have her cremated, so you could see her peaceful face one last time. God, she was beautiful. You missed her so so much. This was your fault. This was your fault. This was your fault.

 

_What's the worst that I can say?_

_Things are better if I stay_

_So long and goodnight_

_So long and goodnight_

 

Frank sat on the other side of you and squeezed your hand, giving you a reassuring smile. He knew how you felt. They all knew. If she was here she would be drying your eyes and whispering calm words to you. She seemed to know you better than anyone else... But she was gone. She was gone, and was never coming back to you. All because of your stupid mistake. She shouldn't have drank that much and you shouldn't have let her go home. If you had made her wate just maybe you'd be holding her.

 

_There came a time_

_When every star fall brought you to tears again_

_We are the very hurt you sold_

 

When Gerard got up to speak at the podium you held back another sob. He too looked close to tears as he spoke of his sister. You want to run out of there. You want to throw up. You want her back. At this point you would do anything.

 

_And what's the worst you take (worst you take)_

_From every heart you break (heart you break)_

_And like the blade you stain (blade you stain)_

_Well, I've been holding on tonight_

 

The church was beautiful, decorated in blacks and reds. She loved those colors...God you need alcohol. Frankly you were surprised the boys could convince you to even show up. You had been doing nothing but sulking and drinking yourself to unconsciousness. Sure it'd probably kill you, but you don't seem to care. Hell, who expected you to keep it together. The church they chose to hold the service in was where your wedding was to be held in two months time. Sorry, was.

 

_What's the worst that I can say?_

_Things are better if I stay_

_So long and goodnight_

_So long and goodnight_

 

It was your turn to speak. Ray gave you a look of pity and muttered something about not having to go up there. You shook your head and made your way to the church's podium. Looking to your left at the fallen angel in the coffin next to you, you take a deep, shaky breath. As you quietly addressed the crowd of mourners you took a moment to gaze at Helena's dress. It was the dress she was going to wear your wedding day. It seems a bit depressing with its black lace and red sash. But now it had a reason to be.

 

_And if you carry on this way_

_Things are better if I stay_

_So long and goodnight_

_So long and goodnight_

 

You shakily returned to your seat with unrequested assistance from Mikey. Frank handed you another tissue whal Ray gave you that damned look again. You hated all this pity. God, this was all wrong. Why did this have to happen to her? To you? Just make it stop! Tears streamed down your face as the collective crowd bowed their heads in prayer.

 

_Can you hear me?_

_Are you near me?_

_Can we pretend_

_To leave and then_

_We'll meet again_

_When both our cars collide._

 

You closed your eyes and bowed your head, though not in prayer. She was an atheist, it's not something she would have wanted. Your thoughts wandered to the black box your lover lied in. Her final resting place. In your mind you could see her. Her eyes snapped open and she lowered her feet to the church's cold floor. She gracefully twirled and plied toward you. Closer and closer, into your face. She spun and reached out to embrace you before twirling once more and falling back, gone once more.

 

_What's the worst that I can say?_

_Things are better if I stay_

_So long and goodnight_

_So long and goodnight_

 

Your head snapped up at the feel of a hand on your shoulder. Mikey lightly shook you. You must have fallen asleep. It would make since, as you hadn't had more than two hours of sleep since that night. You moved to join the rest of the sea of mourners to say your final goodbyes. You opened your typical black umbrella and watched as the boys struggled with the heavy coffin. You let out one final sob as they lowered it into the hearse and Gerard closed the door. And just like that, the love of your life was gone.

 

_And if you carry on this way_

_Things are better if I stay_

_So long and goodnight_

_So long and goodnight_


End file.
